The Umbra Staff
by Jaina Kenobi
Summary: [The Adventure Zone] A series of short scenes, expanding on Lup's time in the Umbra Staff with Taako. Rating for language. (It's Lup, of course there's language. Also, it's TAZ. Of course there's language.)
1. Here There Be Siblings

It didn't take long for Lup to figure out that something was wrong. Taako's incredibly bland reaction to finding her body was the first clue - like, he probably should have recognized her robe, right? And obviously he had to recognize the fucking Umbra Staff. He'd seen her use it at least a zillion times. And his only reaction was to just sort of blandly say, "So now I have an umbrella." Taako was an aloof elf, with a penchant for pretending not to care, but he had never in his life reacted blandly to his sister. And neither Merle nor Magnus seemed to put the pieces together either.

And then they marched straight over to the goddamn vault itself, where she had sacrificed her body to ensure that the Gauntlet would be safely hidden, and opened it up. And Magnus fucking high-fived the thing. Okay, so part of her laughed. But most of her was worried. He made a Relic of his own. He knew they weren't to be fucked around with. So what was his deal? Why were none of them taking this seriously?

It got worse. The orc woman came back and they asked her what it was - and promptly acted like they couldn't hear her when she answered them. And that's when she knew for sure that something, somehow, was blocking their memories. Of her, of the Relics, and who knows of what else.

But no matter how hard she screamed, Taako heard absolutely nothing. So she decided to wait. To meditate. To find a way to communicate with him and get out of this staff and get back to putting the world to rights.

And she decided to listen. Because whatever happened to her brother and her friends, whatever had made Taako, of all people, forget her-whatever the hell was going on out there, she was going to fix it if she could. Even while trapped in her own staff.

* * *

It was hard, meditating while trying to focus on listening to what was going on outside, but Lup was very good at hard things, and it wasn't like she had anything else to do. And the trip back to Phandolin was pretty uneventful, relatively speaking.

And then she heard his voice.

Hearing Taako's voice had been a beacon to her, a ray of light that had burst in on her prison and renewed her determination and sense of purpose.

Hearing Barry's voice about broke her.

She couldn't even focus on what he was saying at first. It was just hearing him, his voice muffled through Taako's bag, and if she'd still had a heart it would have skipped a beat. If she'd had hands, they would have been trembling. He was okay. He was right there. And she couldn't get to him.

And shit was bad. Someone had the Gauntlet, and the boys were right in the thick of it. And all she could do was listen, and panic as it went from bad to worse. Barry was killed - killed by her own creation.

God, what if the power of the Light of Creation was enough to destroy his lich form? What if it was permanent?

She screamed into the silence, but of course no one heard her. Distantly, she could hear Taako insisting that they go back for Barry, but it was too late.


	2. Moonstruck

Killian's explanation about the Bureau of Balance didn't clear much up for Lup, but it did even less for the boys, who apparently couldn't even hear it. And things only got more confusing when she heard them talking about the void fish. Fisher? It was the only explanation she could think of - but she'd never heard of anybody drinking its tank water. And what was Fisher doing here? Magnus would never have let anyone abuse his pet this way if he had remembered it. Another piece that didn't seem to fit in this bizarre puzzle.

At least it seemed to clear up their strange inability to hear anything. The Bureau people referred to it as being inoculated. Lup thought it sounded creepy.

And then she heard Lucretia.

She was relieved for a moment, even when the boys failed to recognize her, too, and she seemed not to know them. But then Lup heard her dear friend say the unthinkable: "I'm going to need you to hand over the gauntlet so we can destroy it promptly."

Destroy it? Lucretia! The others seemed to have forgotten, but Lucretia—what have you misremembered to make you believe that the Grand Relics should be destroyed? They were the only thing holding this world together! The only thing keeping the Hunger at bay!

To add insult to injury, she heard Lucretia ordering Davenport to help her. Davenport. Her captain. The man who should have had the most authority to stop her, to override her, as he'd done before when they'd come up with their desperate plan and convinced her not to cut off this plane from everything so thoroughly that it would destroy everything.

Lup raged against the inside of her prison, but nothing came of it. She could only listen as Davenport took her Gauntlet away to destroy it.

* * *

Thankfully, the journey to this Bureau was long enough to give her a chance to meditate and gather some power about her. She didn't know what she was going to do with it, yet, but she had it at her disposal.

And then Lucretia put them in some sick trial. Like, what the hell was she trying to accomplish with that little show of nonsense? Lup couldn't see, stuck in Taako's bag, but she could hear - and she heard her brother's wand snap. And felt his rising fear.

"Fuck, no." It wasn't as much power as she'd wanted to muster, but she wasn't going to let him get trampled by whatever nonsense Lucretia had set up for them. Had she just snapped, trying to deal with what they'd done? What was her deal?

She let the heat build and build until the whole staff was shaking with power and she could barely hear or see. And finally Taako pulled out the staff and pointed it at the ogre he'd been fighting, and Lup savors the moment for just a second before she explodes all the energy she'd stored up, firing with him out of the staff.

If she had knees, they'd be shaking.

She went back to meditating, but she didn't miss Lucretia talking about the Red Robes. How dangerous they were. How none of them were left. How they had been the ones to create the Grand Relics. Conveniently leaving out some very pertinent information.

What the hell was all of this about?


	3. Respite

She had time to meditate, to gather her power, while the boys were on the train. She kept an eye out for new clues to the bizarre situation in which they found themselves, but nothing happened she needed to worry about. Taako acquitted himself… well, like Taako. It was strange, how comforting she found his nonsense, even half-heard from the depths of her meditation. She felt a jolt of pleasant power when the staff absorbed the defeated Jenkins's wand, and stored it up for when Taako would need her next, or when she could find a way to free herself.

And eventually they were successful in acquiring the Oculus.

This time, though, outside of Taako's bag, she could see. And she saw that Lucretia had her own relic, her staff, with her. So why hadn't she destroyed that one? Was she—could it be that she was not, in fact, destroying them, but hiding them somewhere safe? Protecting the world from their dangers? Perhaps all was not lost - perhaps this was some kind of long game, maybe she was trying to do the right thing. Maybe something had happened to take these three and destroy their minds somehow, and Lucretia was trying to set it right?

She was afraid to hope. But she did.


	4. Train Games

While Taako, Magnus and Merle raced through the desert, she watched. When the halfling smashed the core of her car, though, Lup perked up instantly. The staff hadn't even absorbed its power yet and she already felt stronger just looking at it. When it finally did, she started to tremble with the sheer joy of it. She could only contain herself long enough for Takko to _just fucking point me at something, Bro, I'm so ready to blow some shit up_ \- and then he did.

She let it all go, every scrap of power she'd stored, and she laughed, because it had been so long and she had forgotten her own power. It felt amazing, and for the first time since being imprisoned in her own staff, Lup danced.

And then she meditated, because it was going to take her a long time to gather that much power again. But it had been SO worth it.


	5. Crystals and Macarons

The boys moved on to the next relic. Taako's relic. She wondered if even that would remind him. The sash didn't seem to have done much for Merle.

She learned that this world was getting close to figuring out what IPRE had discovered - this Lucas fellow had made some pretty impressive progress in understanding the planar system. His stuff with the crystals fascinated her, and she dropped her meditation to pay closer attention.

Then Barry came, in his Lich form. If she could have, she'd have wept. He was okay! And he hadn't given up on them. He was trying to explain, he was trying to help. He showed them the Hunger, tried to explain how it worked, but the boys just weren't getting it. How could they, if they didn't remember?

And then he stopped mid-sentence. "Taako! Taako, where did you find that umbrella?"

She could have sung. Barry found her! He knew her! He would tell them, he would get her out, he would know what to do. "Barry! I'm here - I'm in the umbrella, Barry, let me out!" If she could only do something!

Taako shrugged. "Yeah, I took it off this dead thug with a red robe."

The boys kept talking, but Lup didn't hear. She was shouting at Barry, and he was shaking, and losing control of himself.

"What? WHAT? You - you - YOU FOUND HER?"

And he was gone in a burst of flames.

And she sunk against the curtains in her prison, feeling more alone than she ever had, even through all those years in Wave Echo Cave. He hadn't understood. He hadn't let her out.

* * *

Barry's appearance both energized and terrified her her. She meditated fiercely, hardly paying any attention at all to what Taako was doing. He was a clever wizard, she told herself. He would be fine. She had to figure out a way to get him to realize what was going on and let her out of this damn staff. It had gone on long enough.

Her opportunity came when Angus brought his flavorless macarons to Taako as a thank-you for teaching him magic. She liked Angus, and she felt guilty for using Taako's spell against him, but this was more important. Channeling all the energy she possessed, and some she really didn't have to spare, she blazed her name into the wall - L U P - then collapsed against the curtains.

 _Come on, Taako. Come on_.

But he didn't understand. It was like he'd never seen those three letters together in that order before. Lup wanted to scream, but she didn't have the energy for it. She only sighed, and went back to her meditation. She would have to try something else.


	6. Barry Breaks

Lup was now more determined than ever to find a way out of the staff - if it was gonna happen, she would have to be the one to make it happen. She'd straight-up told Taako who she was, and he didn't get it. Well, he was never going to live that down, but first she had to get out of the damn staff. She spent her time loops gathering her power.

But then, there was Barry again, and she had no attention for anything or anyone else.

"I'm really proud of you. I thought there was a chance that maybe this would be the one to end your adventure." She smiled. She was proud of them too, come to that. There was quite a lot it would have been tempting to change.

"I need to know, do you trust me?"

The boys could not have been more empathic in their denial, and its effect was immediate. Poor Barry started to lose his composure again, and almost hit Merle with his uncontrolled energy. He fell to his knees and for the first time since Phandolin she heard his voice, not his harsh whisper but his real voice. And he said her name. He addressed _her_.

"Lup, they don't trust me. I can't do it anymore, Lup. I'm sorry."

She froze. Did he know? Did he sense her presence? She was so close! If she could only signal to him, somehow -

Once again she used all the power she had to scream. "Barry! Barry, I'm right here, I can help you, Barry, just help me get out of here! Please! I trust you, I've always trusted you, I will always trust you!"

But he didn't respond. After a moment, he regained his composure, and continued in his harsh whisper, "The next time we meet, I will need you to trust me completely and absolutely. Otherwise, all of this will have been for nothing. The Hunger is almost here. And when it arrives, this world will be lost."

And before she could muster enough power to try to cast something, he was gone. Again.

"FUCK!"


	7. Date with Death

Lup knew her brother pretty damn well, and it wasn't like she hadn't figured out that he had a crush on Death. But she sure as hell didn't expect him to pursue it in the midst of all the rest of this shit. And she was really, really annoyed that he brought the Umbra Staff along. Sure, from his perspective it was just like a wand or anything else, and given that the conversation was equal parts flirtation and… well, whatever the rest of it was, he probably wanted his weapon on hand just in case. But DAMN it was awkward. She tried not to listen, and did a pretty decent job of it until Kravitz had a good old-fashioned freak out at her.

"There's something here. It was in the Millers' lab too, I could feel it. It's dead and it's powerful and it's extremely close. Are you harboring a dark spirit, Taako? Do you – do you have suspicions that you might be some sort of vessel?"

Lup swore.

"Maybe? I mean, it's been, like, a few years. Was that a thing for a while? I eat old dead dudes with my umbrella, is that a possibility, maybe?"

She swore again. She was definitely going to have to do something quick, or she would be exchanging one prison for another. She gathered her power and raised the staff to point at Kravitz's back.

But Taako fought back. And she could not override him. And then it was too late, and her scorching ray shot harmlessly into the sky.

"Son of a fucking fuck!" she shouted.

And then Taako was handing the staff over to Kravitz directly, completely unaware that he could well be damning his own sister, and she was panicking-

But he barely examined the staff before he handed it back. He must not have known - must not have realized - and she was safe. It was over. She slumped back against her curtains and started gathering her power again for another try at - well, at something.


	8. Wonderland

There are two kinds of torture in a place like Wonderland. One is Taako's. One is Lup's.

She could hear everything, and it was agony. She knew before Taako did that it was wrong, that there were a couple of immensely powerful liches out there who were manipulating reality based on some incredibly powerful dark magic. And she was horrified at the thought of what they would do to her brother and her friends. But her horror was nothing to what it became as she watched it happen.

As they sacrificed more and more to the liches's insatiable hunger, she began to pace, to shout, to claw at the curtains that hemmed her in, desperate for a way out, but of course to no avail. She was absolutely frantic. Taako was losing more and more of himself. She could hear his exhaustion in his every word; she could see him giving up.

She tried to gather more power to herself, but it was harder like this, when she couldn't concentrate. And it wasn't just Taako, although he was definitely the worst of them. Merle and Magnus were in dire straits too, and she could see Merle working harder and harder to maintain his composure while spell after spell flickered away, all but powerless. Magnus… bless him, he was doing everything he could to stay positive, but what was sustaining him? And could it last?

It was the Boss Rush arena that gave her the first flicker of hope - when the staff consumed Jenkins's wand. Lup did not hesitate. She channeled all that power back to Taako with so much force that when he stood up a bit straighter she wasn't sure if it was her that did it. But the tiny smile that flickered at the corner of his lips was all him, and she was thrilled to see it.

And that fucking T-rex was the shit. Lup was screaming and cheering and begging all the gods that it would work. And it DID.

"That's my BOY! That's my brother! YES!"


	9. Useful

She didn't realize what they had done to Magnus until it was too late - but Taako got it. And he responded before Lup had time to curse. She could only wait, holding her metaphorical breath. And she didn't know quite what was going on, when Taako and Merle went still and all the liches in the room, visible and otherwise, waited in confusion to see what would happen next.

And then Taako and Merle came back. And Magnus… well, sort of. And they fought on. Lup was frantic, and could do nothing. She was completely useless! Trapped within her own creation. She stopped paying attention to what was going on outside the staff. It was too much. She would gather her power, and wait, and hope—

Just like that, a present fell into her lap. Almost literally. For the first time in a decade, Lup wasn't alone.

"Are you the one who's been hurting my brother out there?"

He stammered and tried to clamber up but Lup was having none of it.

Through gritted teeth she swore, "I'm gonna fucking kill you now."

She probably blasted him harder than she needed to. Well, no. She definitely blasted him much, much harder than she needed to. She definitely savored the moment. She definitely relished her power because it felt SO DAMN GOOD to hurt back, to actually help her brother, to be useful again.

And then she shot his damn body back out of the staff and slumped to the ground. Alone. In all, it had taken just a few seconds. A few seconds with the first being she'd seen in forever, while she slaughtered him in her rage.

She was exhausted, but she was glowing. It felt GOOD.


	10. Barry's Tale

"Oh my God."

It was Barry. She thought she was getting used to hearing him pop in and out of her brother's adventures, but she wasn't. It still shot through her like lightning. She mustered her remaining energy and focused her senses outside of the staff—it was harder when she was exhausted—and looked for him.

He was there, and she realized that he had been there for a while, and he was working as hard as any of them to get everybody out of there okay.

She listened as they headed away from what used to be Wonderland, straining for another hint of Barry's voice, but it was a while before he spoke again. And he explained that something was about to go down. But he was so cryptic about it, and it took her a second to realize that he meant the Hunger. The Hunger was on its way. Whatever Lucretia had been doing, it wasn't working, and Barry didn't trust her any more or he wouldn't have cut them off from her and the rest of the Bureau. Lup wasn't surprised. She didn't have half the information he did, and she'd long since stopped trusting Lucretia.

"…once I'm in my body, I'm gonna forget all of the truths that I know now in my lich form," he explained. Another piece to the puzzle that she still didn't quite understand. He could only remember when he was dead. She watched intently, peering through the folds of her brother's cloak at the tank in which floated an indistinct form which, even as indistinct as it was, she knew and loved as much as her own self. Barry.

She waited desperately, closing off her other senses, watching with all her might, as Barry descended into his own body and then—there he was. Glorious in his imperfection. Much as she loved him as a lich, there was something about that body that just… well. She wanted to cry, or laugh, but without a body of her own she could do neither. And so she watched, hungrily, as he stepped out and started talking with the boys. And then his coin started to talk.

"Your name is Barry Bluejeans. You are afraid of the dark." Lup smirked. Not when she was around. Which, of course, she wasn't. The smirk faded. "Your very favorite thing in the world is swimming in very cold water on a very hot day. You get ill when you drink milk or anything with milk in it. Your father Greggor died when you were too young to know him. Your mother, Marleana, had soft gray hair when you were born, and was the most wonderful woman who ever lived. You remember them but you have forgotten so much. And right now, in this moment, you feel a dull weight in your chest. It's the weight of a love that defined and redeemed you but you've forgotten who that weight belongs to."

She didn't hear the rest. Just that much gutted her. "Barry…" she whispered. "Oh gods, Barry, I'm so sorry, Babe."

It was a minute before she gathered herself enough to tune back in, and the boys were talking amongst themselves. "I don't know what this means but it-it means… something, and-and I've been... remembering things. I - I can remember knowing Barry before now. I can remember being somewhere that had two suns," Magnus said. "I remember things... but I have no idea why or how? And…" He sighed. "All I know is that there's...there's so much more going on."

Taako shifted the umbra staff, and Lup could see the three of them more clearly now. "Okay, so here's my theory. I think there's another voidfish. It's not a big cognitive leap, when you were describing whatever it was you were just describing, I heard the Voidfish crinkle-tinkles. My ASMR was going buck wild."

So he couldn't hear when Magnus described their home. And their life before arriving here. And Barry could, but only when he was dead. Which Magnus was too, technically.

"Yeah. It makes complete sense because I… I swam with the Voidfish, and it sang to me. It sang two words. Egg, and babe. I think it means that the voidfish has a baby."

Oh. That made even more sense.

But why the hell was Lucretia forcing them to forget everything by feeding it to Fisher and its baby? What the hell did she think she was doing? It didn't make sense! A hundred years of traveling the universes and she just up and betrays them all? Joins the Hunger? Sure, they'd all changed during their journey together, but you'd think they would have noticed something that drastic.

The boys were still talking about how best to get back to the bureau when Taako abruptly stepped back. "Listen, I have an update from Taako Central. I've updated my list of people I trust and things I believe to No one and Nothing. Not a joke, I don't trust you, half-pint, I don't trust Jeff from Today's Special, I don't trust Barold - whatever his name - nobody, I trust nobody, nothing. And I'm - I have - you've convinced me to add the Director and her crew - her coterie - to that list, but it does not extend - it is no one. There is nothing and no one."

Magnus sounded as worried as Lup felt. "Is it at least a sliding scale, Taako? Do you trust us like, a little less or a little more than The Director, where are we at as far as placement on the-"

"It's a big ol' void! All orbiting planet Taako, of non-trust!"

She could hear the fear in his voice, the betrayal, and it wounded her, but she understood.


	11. Trust

Taako's words shook her badly. But there was one person in the world she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he could trust, and that was Barry. Everything else in the universe might have been royally fucked, but Barry would find a way to set it right.

She watched them head back to the Bureau, watched them make a plan, and all the while, she was muttering, "Trust Barry. Trust Barry, Taako. Love Barry. Trust Barry. Love Barry." Come on, Taako. It's not all lost. Not yet. "Trust Barry. Love Barry."

And then he put on the telepathic band, and looked startled. Could he—could he hear her? "Taako, it's - it's me, it's your sister, it's me, trust Barry!"

She had no idea if she'd gotten through, but she was gonna keep trying until she knew he understood. "Trust Barry! Taako, trust Barry!"

A while later, she heard Taako address Barry. And she shut off all her other senses again, to listen with all her might, still chanting "Trust Barry" in her mind.

"Hey, listen. And think hard before you answer. We've been, uh, fighting alongside the Bureau of Balance for a long time. I need you to tell me, in a sentence, why we should trust you and turn against the Bureau."

Lup kept chanting. "Trust Barry. Love Barry."

Barry hesitated before he answered. "Um… I don't—I don't think I'm evil? Like, I don't think I'm an evil guy? I don't—obviously there's like, some pretty big holes in the ol' Barry story, but, like, I don't—"

"You have veered off sentence and are hurtling towards paragraph, my friend. A sentence, please. Time is of the essence and I think you need this worse than we do."

Barry's voice sounded both unsure and resigned. "I don't know, but I feel like I trust you."

Lup nearly screamed. "Trust him! Trust Barry! Taako, trust him!"


	12. Taako Breaks

Lup knew that Lucretia had done something, but as she heard the explanation, as Taako started to remember, as they all started to remember… it was only the shakiness of her old friend's voice that stayed her absolute fury, that kept her from shooting off as strong a spell as she had ever done from her prison. Whatever Lucretia had done, what she had meant to do was to fix it. She was trying to do exactly what Lup had tried to do, and both of them had paid one hell of a price for it.

And neither of them had succeeded, until now. Lucretia was channeling the last of the energy from Barry's bell into her staff, and then she was going to cast her shield and the whole fucking world was going to end. Because Lucretia thought she knew best, and she was wrong.

Then Taako got to his feet, and pointed the staff at Lucretia, and started counting down, his voice as shaky as his hand. "Ten."

Lup felt relieved and horrified in equal measures. What had they come to?

"Nine."

Lucretia tried to protest, but Taako kept counting.

His voice cracked yet more when Magnus finally talked him down. "You know, honestly? Do whatever you want. I don't care anymore." And he sounded so defeated.

Magnus stepped forward. "Lucretia, remember that Taako just realized he lost his sister. This isn't the time for you to explain yourself!

"Taako, listen. I know this is tough but—you found her! Maybe not how you expected to, but when you weren't looking you found her. That's the connection—that's how strong your connection is to Lup. She's still helping you, you're still working together! And she wouldn't want you to give up!"

"Taako, I'm right here!" she shouted, hoping he would hear her again. But his shoulders just slumped further, and he turned away.

"I appreciate what you're trying to do. And I'm on board for whatever the plan is. But understand this: I have nothing, and I don't give a shit. The world is ending, and I. Don't. Care."

And Lup's heart shattered. Because what she told Taako decades ago was true. "You are my heart." And Taako had shattered.


	13. Triumph

Lucretia was still talking. "I— this is going to be hard to hear but remember, almost a century ago, Lup made us promise that we would never again put a world in danger just to thwart The Hunger's plans. And that is exactly, _exactly_ what we did to this world! And—and that's why I took steps to fix it. What makes you think she wasn't out there trying to do this exact same thing when she disappeared?"

 _I was_ , Lup thought, _but I wasn't gonna destroy the fucking world in the process, thanks._

Davenport cut in, "Where's the ship, Lucretia? We need to leave before it's too late. This plan, it didn't work, so we leave here and we—we try again. We leave here and—Barry, Taako, we leave here and Lup comes back."

"What?" Taako almost sounds… hopeful. And Lup considers. It would work. No reason why it wouldn't. But they'd sworn never to run again. And the devastation they would bring upon this world would be all the greater because they'd spent the last ten years weakening it with their damned relics.

Merle was already protesting. They had to stand. They had to fight. They had to end it.

And then it was too late. The Hunger was here, and they were fighting, and even if they'd wanted to go they had no ship.

Lup stored as much power as she could during the battle, biding her time for the right moment. It was her best chance. Taako and Barry both remembered her now, and they had the staff—surely they would figure it out. She just had to give them a sign.

She watched and she waited and she gathered her power around her, flames licking at her hands. The boys—all of them, really—were in rare form, but the Hunger was strong, and when Taako was knocked to the floor and she was knocked from his hands, she knew her chance had come.

When Angus picked her up and cast his spell, she released it all, the biggest fireball she'd managed yet. If that didn't do it, nothing would.

Angus looked shaken and flung the staff back to Taako, and Taako—Taako knew.

He smashed the staff over his knee.

And Lup was free.

She wasted no time. That fucking Hunger was going DOWN and it was going down hard. Free of the staff, her full power was returned to her, and she reveled in it. Expertly guiding the destruction to the enemy, away from her friends and their friends, she spun and twirled around the column of Hunger and filled it with shattering power. It was almost a dance, and it was delightful. The column exploded, and all its warriors with it.

Lup turned back to Taako, beaming, and a million things came to her lips. All the words she'd screamed at him over the last year, how fucking proud she was of him, how worried she'd been.

And she shouted, "You're dating the GRIM REAPER?"

* * *

The end.

I binged TAZ in like a week and a half, and I couldn't stop thinking about all the times Lup must have been just crushed in that staff. So I wanted to tell the rest of her story, and, uh, here it is! Enjoy!


End file.
